


Loyalty & Devotion

by DetCoAngel



Category: Haikyuu!!, Tsukishima Kei x Yamaguchi Tadashi - Fandom, Tsukkiyama - Fandom
Genre: M/M, TsukkiYama Week 2020, Tsukkiyama Week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:47:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26109664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DetCoAngel/pseuds/DetCoAngel
Summary: An AU wherein Yamaguchi Tadashi is consumed by the trilogy entitled 'Loyalty & Devotion' which was created by the famous writer with the pen name 'Moonlit'
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei & Yamaguchi Tadashi, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi, tsukkiyama
Comments: 6
Kudos: 44
Collections: TsukkiYama Week 2020





	Loyalty & Devotion

**Author's Note:**

> TsukkiYama Week Day 3  
> Prompt: Writer

Yamaguchi Tadashi is a 25-year-old office worker in the city's busiest Design Company. He was renowned for being the highest-paid Art Director of the said company. He loves art more than anything else. 

But one day, he was intrigued by the commotion happening in the bookstore near the station and so he swung by. He learned that there was a newly released book that was very popular, and due to his immense curiosity, he bought it. Not knowing that a single book will lead him far greater.

"Hey! You're also a fan of Moonlit?!" a co-worker of Yamaguchi asked in excitement, eyeing the book he was reading. 

"Moonlit?" He responded in utter confusion

"Yes! The author of the book you're reading! That's one of his best-selling novel, Lost in the Dark Abyss" his co-worker, Yachi Hitoka, explained, making Yamaguchi take a glance at the cover of the book

The cover is a beautifully drawn illustration of a sunset. It depicts a glowing sun dipped below the horizon, illuminating a quivering path across the water. bathing the ocean's meek waves and straggly clouds in red. 

"That's actually the third installation of his series entitled Loyalty & Devotion." 

"What? I didn't know"

"They can act as stand-alone but if you want further context, you should read the first two. I'm telling you, it's really chef kisses" 

As soon as he reached the last page of the book, he felt that something in him clicked. He wants more, he craved for more. The book's so good that even at their breaks, he'd rather read the book than actually eat. It's the kind of material that will surely hook anyone to finish it in one sitting. 

"Okay, I'll go to the bookstore later" 

When their meeting finished, he hurriedly cleaned his workspace and left the company. Eager to find the book that his co-worker is recommending him. 

When he entered the Bookshop, he was welcomed by a huge standee of the book he just finished with a sign "Moonlit's new release" at the top of it.

"Hmmm. So this is really popular huh" after asking the clerk for directions, he was pointed at the isle where Romance Fiction is located

"Hmmmm. Moonlit, moonlit." Yamaguchi chanted as he looked for the name of the author at the sea of books in front of him

He actually forgot to ask Yachi for the title of the book she was recommending. When he was about to take out his phone to call the other, two female students that passed by him, piqued his interest

"Have you read Moonlit's new release? It was so so so good"

"Yes! The series kept getting better and better. Did you remember the second installment? The Broadened Gap? God! I cried really hard!" 

"I know!! I literally bawled my eyes out. But my favorite is still the first one! The Increased Proximity. I can really feel the love. Ugh!"

With that, he decided not to call her anymore. "So the series is this popular that even students read this? Woah" Yamaguchi said in pure wonder as he looks at the two books he's currently holding.

As soon as he got home, he hurriedly unwrapped the first book: The Increased Proximity

The cover showcases the beauty of the sunrise. There appears, a tiny ball at the exquisitely drawn horizon. It was dark with a tint of gold.

He finally flopped down in his bed and started to immerse himself in the world of words.

As he went further in reading, he was pulled and swallowed whole into the universe the author created. He was swayed with the emotions the characters are feeling.

He felt every emotion that was depicted by the lead's narration. He felt the great desire when the lead character confessed to himself that he adores his best friend from afar. He felt the longing, pain, and jealousy the mainstay would feel whenever someone approached his beloved. He felt the struggle of the leading man, struggling to confess his feelings.

He felt the great relief washed his system when the best friend confirmed for being in the same boat as the other. He felt the chills on his spine when the protagonists first held hands. He felt the passion and tenderness when the lovers' had their first kiss. He felt the sincerity when the two guys in the book he was reading first said their "I love you's" to each other.

He felt it all. Yamaguchi felt it all.

It was 3 am when he finally sat up his bed and closed the book.

"It was so surreal I can't stop myself" with immense self-restraint, he chooses to at least eat noodles before continuing to read the second installment

"I won't sleep. I have to finish this today. Damn. What is sleep anyway?" he said grumbling as he hurriedly finished his instant noodles, which was actually the first meal he had for the day

"Okay now, the second part," He said picking and unwrapping the book entitled The Broadened Gap

"The gossipy students at the bookshop said that they cried a river on this book?"

"I guess I have to prepare some tissues"

As he slowly opened to the first page, he started to pray silently, "Please don't be angst. Please don't be angst. Please don't be angst"

"Okay let's start"

After an hour of reading, all that can be heard in the room was him, sniffing and sobbing. Crying and agonizing in pain as he read every word that was written

“I want to hold your hand tighter but whenever I did, I bleed”

“Stop me please, I don’t want to lose you”

“Without you, I feel empty” 

“Why are these lines stabbing right through my heart?!” Yamaguchi whined in between his sobs. Tissues scattered everywhere, eyes swelling due to too much crying. “Ugh! Now I hate the author!” 

“I swear to god if I saw the author I’ll nag at him for putting these babies in too much pain. Why?!” Yamaguchi continued to cry until the last page of the book. 

“I left my heart with you”

“Damn! The protagonists clearly still loved each other! Why do they have to break-up?” he angrily ruffled his hair, frustrated at the ending of the book. It was angst.

At exactly 7 am, Yamaguchi decided to start his day and get ready for work. When he looked at the mirror on his bathroom, the reflection showed a person he didn’t even recognize at first “What the hell happened to my face?” dark circles underneath his eyes, messy and disheveled dark grayish-green hair, tear-stained cheeks, and swollen lips

“Woah! Tadashi! Had the zombies ate your brains?” his colleague greeted him as soon as he sat down his office chair

“Huh?” still groggily staring at the closed desktop, Yamaguchi answered

“You look like one! Have you even slept?!” 

“No….” He answered while suppressing a yawn by his hands

“What did you do? Luckily we don’t have any meetings for today!” Yachi replied with worry written all over her face

“I finished the two books prior to Lost in The Abyss. Speaking of that. I literally bawled myself out last night! The second book was so heartbreaking!” revived due to the thought of the book, he faced his colleague 

“I know right! I also cried for hours! Everything is so heartfelt.” Yachi said dreamily while wiping imaginary tears away

“Especially when the lead left the country to chase his dreams! I cried at that part the most! I mean..” I actually could relate 

Yamaguchi cut himself off before saying the last phrase

Yachi needed in agreement “Me too, me too!!”

“At first, I got mad at the lead for wanting to cut-off their relationship! Like I guess you could work things out even though you’re in a long-distance relationship?” Yamaguchi said as he states his opinion regarding Long Distance Relationship

For him, he strongly believed in the principle that everything could be solved if the lovers tried to work things out. He believed that a Long Distance Relationship could actually work if only the two people involved are both willing to try. 

….something he wanted to try before but was rejected and dejected alone.

“Hmm. Well, I totally understand the lead’s sentiments” Yachi said while looking up, thinking deeply like him “They were only High School students, they were so young. Yes, they might be in love, and they might know each other the most, but, there are so many things beyond Love” 

Yamaguchi’s face became sour as Yachi continued to talk and so he butted in “I agree that there are things beyond Love but you can also do those things without casting Love aside! Won’t it be easier if they conquered the world together? ” 

“Yamaguchi, life was never easy.” The woman paused for a while for she finally noticed the scowl in Yamaguchi’s face “There are battles that one should face alone. There are conflicts and struggles that only that person can solve and no one else. I understand what you’re saying but personally, I would go for the choice of the lead. They probably need growth outside their little bubble.”

“I don’t understand the lead at all! He hurt his partner, he didn’t even discuss the matter with the other. He just plainly kept quiet and silently wished in his head for the things he wanted to happen.” Yamaguchi rebutted with full frustration “It was stated in the book that he didn’t want to leave but he didn’t say it. It was stated in the book that he was hurting but he didn’t show it. It was stated in the book that he longed for his love but he never talked about it!”

“Oh my god, why are you so affected?” Yachi finally snapped

“I’m sorry. I was just carried away” He said while avoiding the female’s accusing gaze

“He explained it in the latest book right?” His colleague finally answered before turning her computer on, ending the heated discussion.  
Yamaguchi sighed in defeat. He wished that he could understand, he wished that he could comprehend, but he simply can’t. Not when the book hurts a sore topic in his past. 

He was hooked because it felt familiar. When he first read The Increased Proximity, nostalgia is all he could feel. 

The feeling of secretly loving your best friend whom you grew up with, the slight pang in the heart whenever someone will try to confess their feelings to your beloved, the overflowing joy felt when your best friend confessed that he loved you too, the tingling feeling and the butterflies in the stomach in every intimacy. It was all so familiar. 

That’s why before reading the second book, he wished and prayed that the ending would be different than his. But it was not.

It was still so familiar that the scar buried deep inside of him opened up like it all happened yesterday. He was so frustrated that he kept on thinking that probably this was the same.

Maybe this was what he was thinking when he left me alone.

So he tried to understand the leading man, but he just can’t.

After six grueling hours of work, it’s finally time to go home but before he was able to do so, Yachi and his other colleagues came ganging up on him

“Yamaguchi! You read Moonlit’s works too right?!” Hinata, the orange-haired guy asked with unparalleled enthusiasm

“Yes, I just finished the series a while ago” He answered

“Then do you want to come with us? Apparently, the author was holding a book signing event near the station” The raven-haired guy asked, dropping his arm around Hinata in the process.

“You should come Yama-yama!~” Yachi and Hinata cajoled 

“Okay” Yamaguchi was not able to do anything but agree

After a few minutes of walking and chatting, they finally reached the venue. It was the bookshop he went to yesterday.

“I didn’t notice the book signing poster when I came last time” he commented as they lined up. 

The queue was quite long but the four did not get bored since they kept talking about their own opinions towards the series. When they were nearing the author’s table, they all brought out their own copies of The Increased Proximity, The Widened Gap, and Lost in The Dark Abyss.

Yamaguchi held the first two books out but he can’t find the third one “I think I left the latest at my house” he announced to his co-workers

“Awww. I heard the author travels a lot and would only stay in Japan for a few months before flying out again so that’s why this is a rare opportunity. And you dared forgot his latest work?!” Hinata reprimanded him

“Sho, calm down.” Tobio, the raven-haired guy, cooled down his partner 

Yamaguchi felt a slight regret for making this rare opportunity slip his hands.

“Shhh! Keep quiet! We’re next” Yachi sushed them all

They formed an individual line. Yachi came first, then Hinata, then Tobio, and he was last in line. He was not sure why but he was nervous. 

Why am I nervous?  
Is it because I don’t have his latest work?  
Wait, isn’t that embarrassing?  
Should I buy it again?

Several thoughts swirled around his head that made him more nervous. He was about to step out of the line to buy the latest book again but was interrupted by Tobio who slightly bowed and waved goodbye to the person in front of him.

“Oh! It’s my turn” Yamaguchi took a light step forward, eyes locked at the nameplate sitting in front of the desk that clearly says “MOONLIT” 

He bowed as a sign of respect and finally lifted his gaze up.

He was welcomed by a face he never knew he would see once again. There in front of him, sitting a tall blonde guy. He had this white and clear complexion that suits his cream-colored turtle neck topped with a brown leather jacket. There staring at him a pair of golden-brown eyes, covered with black-framed eyeglasses. 

The two were lost on their own thoughts. Shocked beyond words, mirroring each other’s surprised expression

It was him, the guy he was talking about. The guy whom he felt in love with when they are in High School, his childhood friend, his former best friend, his former lover – Tsukishima Kei.

Yamaguchi was about to leave and ditch the event but he was stopped by a strong arm that grabbed his wrist. 

Eyeing the two books at his hands, “Have you read?” the tall blonde-guy asked with the familiar low voice that used to melt Yamaguchi’s insides away.

“Y-yes” Yamaguchi answered without looking at the former. He can’t look because he knew that the emotions in his eyes would give away all the longingness he stored up until now.

“How about the third? Have you read?” Tsukishima asked again

“Yes” with that, Yamaguchi pulled his hand back and run towards the exit of the bookshop, ignoring his co-workers’ loud call of his name

He runs so fast without looking back. He runs and runs as if running physically can help him run away from his resurfacing emotions. 

At last, he read again the third the installation of the series – Lost in the Dark Abyss.

It was a story of constant loneliness. When he first read this, he instantly loved it because he felt the same. He felt as hollow as the protagonist, he felt as empty as the leading man, he felt as lonely as him.

As he read and process more on the content of the book, he came to realize the message the author was trying to relay. 

"I’m setting you free to see you fly"

"I am in constant darkness but you were my guiding light"

"In every place I go, your memory is with me"

"I want to go back to you"

"I’ll go back to you, I’ll make myself better and be with you forever"

"I’m going to win you back"

Those lines hit him like a lighting “I-is this?”

Going back to the two prior books, realization dawned at him. That’s why it was way too familiar. ” All of these books are ours? Our story? So is t-this what he felt? Is this his own point of view?” Yamaguchi asked himself as he cried while holding the third book

Amidst the dark and quiet room, Yamaguchi was in, a ray of light came peeping from his phone, someone is calling. 

The caller ID displayed an unknown number

Thinking that maybe it was one of his colleagues, he answered. 

He was about to apologize for running away but the other end spoke first.

“Hello? Tadashi?” two words. It only took two words to make Yamaguchi sob again. It was that familiar voice. It was the voice he longed to hear for so many years

“It’s okay if you don’t want to talk, but can you please at least listen to what I am about to say?”

“Please open the last page of the third book, Lost in the Dark Abyss” Yamaguchi did not talk and just silently opened on the last page 

There he read the two sentences that proved their Loyalty and Devotion:

"I always love you. Then and now, my heart only beats for you."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> Let's be moots! @DetCoAngel


End file.
